Why Is It OK To Rape Boys?

Written by Jasmin


With the amount of rape hysteria amongst the feminist movement the public would naturally expect that one of their chief feminist idols, known for ‘smashing the glass ceiling’ in media would want to protect any child victim of statutory rape.

Reporting for ABC’s 2020 program Barbara Walters has just demonstrated that rape of a boy is for sensationalising, instead of the demonizing the act of Pedophilia by a female predator.

Tonight, the interview with Mary Kay Letourneau and Vili Fualaau, the man Letourneau raped as a 12 year old boy, is being aired to showcase their scandalous ‘love affair’ which started some 19 years ago.

Except this is not a love affair, it’s a story of statutory rape.

I’m not going to go into the details of this story as it matters little, except that the hypocrisy of the media when speaking about Female Sex Predators needs to be examined.

The media are well aware of their responsibility to speaking respectfully to gender when reporting about sexual assault and abuse.  The following extract is from the 2012 report Coming Clean on Duty of Care: Australian print media’s representation of male versus female sex offenders in institutional contexts:  

“The above analysis of the articles makes visible the previously unseen, revealing a distinct bias in the manner in which sexual offences perpetrated by males, whether against boys or girls, are reported when compared with those reports of similar offences committed by females. The bias seems to be pitched against males. The findings of this paper suggest that the representation of male sex offenders in the Australian media will normally attract the use of pejorative gender-labels, such as paedophile or pervert, whereas similar offences involving female sex offenders do not. Frequently, sexual offences perpetrated by females seem somewhat mitigated by the near romanticisation of the situations by use of such words as young lover or pupil lover to describe a student for whose care the female offender has been responsible and by tending to infantilise women and deny them sexual agency in offences against minors.”

The media knows what it is doing when it downplays Female Sex Predators and it does so because it plays straight into the hands of women in the form of a ‘love affair’.

Media production and online and print editorial is very feminist based. With women controlling 80% of household expenditure, advertising dollars therefore have a strong bias to women’s issues. So when media report issues of a sexual abuse of a boy in a positive light they are enabling female perpetrators and exacerbating the myth that men and boys can’t be raped.

Here are some examples of the polarising and stereotypical comments I saw on social media today in response to this show coming to air. All of them are myths of male rape.

If it happens to a guy it’s not rape:

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All boys want sex with an older woman:

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Sexual arousal and sexual desire are the same thing:

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Boys aren’t victims, girls are:

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Amongst the so-called ‘Rape Culture’, media are still not acknowledging male victims as being worthy of respect, even when it’s a minor of 12 years of age. This story should be aired for what it is:

A rape story.

It should seem obvious that the horrors of which we would be speaking if the genders were reversed and the rape had been of a 12 year old girl. To that end it would be almost unspeakable and the language and tone being used to describe this event would be “despicable” “perverted” “depraved” “immoral”.

If this were a man the media would play heavily into the ‘rape culture’ and speak with venom at the despicable acts which unfolded and how the court system failed this boy and his family. However, when they have a golden chance to set things right they still take the lowest moral ground they can, and they further shame male victims of female perpetrated acts by failing to acknowledge the horrific reality of male rape.

If a female rape was glorified in this way the feminist movement would be up in arms at the portrayal of rape as a ‘love affair’.  We do live in a world where sexism exists at it’s most obscene level and I wonder if this is at the expense of and recognition for male victims.

Here’s some food for thought. Who will speak for the men and boys when no one else cares? And for that matter, who will stand up and just say NO to glorifying male rape?


Photo credit: ABC 



About the author


Jasmin is a specialist men’s coach who supports men in all aspects of relationships, but specifically those who are going through high conflict separation and divorce. She is also a dedicate advocate for services for men and their children who have been victims of domestic violence and abuse.

Jasmin helps men who are struggling and feeling lost and alone, to move to a place of acceptance and confidence so they can move ahead and live a life consistent with their values and beliefs. She believes strongly in the power of overcoming past hurts through empathy and compassion.

She is a mother of two, author, presenter and coach. She lives in the idyllic coastal town of Merimbula, NSW, Australia.

*All written material on Relating To Men is subject to copyright to the author.