It’s time to stop “counting dead women” and face the facts

Written by Jasmin

*Post publication:

The tally for men killed in domestic homicides moves to 20 as a woman was charged with murder for an incident in which she killed her husband in a house fire.



We are now at the end of 2016 and the death of women has again been used as the primary smear campaign of Destroy The Joint to push the ideological agenda of feminism which says that sexism against women is the biggest problem our country faces.

The problem with Destroy The Joint is they went off half cocked out of the gate and attributed every death of a woman to domestic violence. They set up their page and told the blind faithful that this was the problem, and the faithful followed. It’s somewhat ironic that radical feminists denounced christianity so quickly, only to re invent the ‘blind belief’ wheel for their own agenda. But I digress ….

Destroy The Joint continue to to make out that when a woman is murdered by a man “known to her” that his indicates domestic violence. It does not, but that makes for a healthy smoke screen to the faithful.  They are quite comfortable knowing that hysteria has been built around their word even though it isn’t true.  It has made for good easy pickings for lazy journalists and they created an ‘epidemic’ where there was none.

The government stepped up to their virtue signalling and decided to stamp out domestic violence by blaming all men for the actions of a minuscule percentage. And yet despite them subsequently spending millions in a male bashing media campaign to ‘stamp out sexism where it starts’ (our infant boys) people still keep murdering each other.

With thanks to the efforts of many of us on social media, particularly Destroy The Narrative,  Destroy the Joint has come under even greater scrutiny and has lost a lot of credibility with their followers. People are starting to raise questions they simply can’t answer and those who do are blocked and banned.

We’ve seen Miranda Devine, Mark Latham, Andrew Bolt, Bettina Arndt and Corrine Barraclough publish prolifically in mainstream media all the while exposing the data which proves that the ideological push of the far left is not helping anyone, especially domestic violence victims.

During White Ribbon’s week long ‘day’ of domestic violence spending (so many conferences to spend ALL that money on you can’t possible fit it in a day) and the subsequent #16days of (complaining about) sexism, Australia reached an all new low in responsible media reporting when Chrissie Swan of NOVA 100 deemed it appropriate to make jokes about a man who had his penis cut off by his wife in her live on air segment. Swan was celebrating this ‘anniversary’ on 25th November, White Ribbon Day! You can read what Mark Dent  had to say when he and many others were quite rightly incensed.

The segment was quickly cut from the NOVA audio file after complaints, but Chrissie has yet to make an on air apology to the volume of men she deeply offended many of whom spoke up directly to the station. Of course, Eddie McGuire’s equally unfunny gaff resulted in a national media meltdown forcing him to apologise, but that’s just because he is a man and they are hypocrites.

And as we have come to expect, the media also ignored the 2 men killed, 2 men stabbed, 2 other women charged with assault all in the same time frame while the national media scrambled for every bit of exposure to highlight examples of male violence.

Rosie Batty made the statement in one of her Press Club schmooze events “when you look on TV all you see is male violence.”  Yeah, Rosie that’s because of the agenda you’re shoving at the media.

A few weeks ago a video went viral when a mother bashed her son with a golf club at a golf driving range. This incident could easily have resulted  in the death of that child in the same way her son was killed.

Rosie still naturally remains silent on women’s violence because it doesn’t pay her bills. I can’t help but wonder if she saw that video what emotions it might trigger in her, because as someone who has witness that exact type of violence, I found this clip extremely angering. How anyone can not want to address the problem of female family violence remains a mystery to me.

As  I did last year, I have again scrutinised the list of Destroy The Joint for those murders which have included family and domestic violence, and eliminated those killed by women so we can see if their narrative is true or false on ‘gendered’ violence. I have republished their list on this page highlighting how I came to the figures below

Women Who Were Murdered in 2016 (Via Destroy The Joint)

This year 71 women have died as a result of violence, 8 of those were killed by other women bringing their total down to 63 women who were killed by men.

  • 38 are domestic or family violence from a male partner
  • 25 are NOT domestic violence, but are other murders including drug crimes or random street violence. 
  • 6 cases involve female murderers of other adult women (we recorded 9 at Destroy The Narrative)
  • 2 Murder Suicides

Women Who Murdered Others in 2016 (Via Destroy The Narrative)

As it stands at the end of December 2016, 38 women have been charged with murder or been responsible for the murder suicide of a child.  A total of 24 of these incidents have involved domestic & family violence including 5 children. 

  • 19 Men killed in domestic or family violence
  • 9 women were killed by other women
  • 5 children were murdered by mothers

Looking from a gendered perspective as Feminist lobby groups insist, we can see from adding both of these tallies that where domestic violence resulted in murder there were a total of 59 cases.

Women murdered by men = 38 (66.6%)
Men murdered by women = 19 (33.3%)

Here is the actual breakdown of Destroy The Joint

  • 53.5% of those cases are deaths of women by their male partners
  • 35% murdered in drug related crimes
  • 10 % were murdered by women
  • 1.5% were murder suicides

I wonder how long the media are going to continue to feed gendered narrative to the public, pushed on them by White Ribbon & Our Watch, or if in 2017 they will open their minds to further highlight the real causes of domestic and family violence which are more about socio economics and substance abuse problems than they are about gender.

Last year when I published The Feminist Elephant article which exposed a similar problem, I had repeated demands to “show the statistics”.  Here is my answer to you now, and then.

These are not “statistics” they are a tally which Destroy The Joint keeps and those of us at Destroy The Narrative have kept. You can scrutinise each story for yourself and I encourage you to do so.  The statistics will be available after all crimes have been fully investigated and they will be recorded by police and the coroners office when they are complete.

So Destroy the Joint can keep “counting dead women” and I will continue to hold them accountable. Or, we can face the facts.




About the author


Jasmin is a specialist men’s coach who supports men in all aspects of relationships, but specifically those who are going through high conflict separation and divorce. She is also a dedicate advocate for services for men and their children who have been victims of domestic violence and abuse.

Jasmin helps men who are struggling and feeling lost and alone, to move to a place of acceptance and confidence so they can move ahead and live a life consistent with their values and beliefs. She believes strongly in the power of overcoming past hurts through empathy and compassion.

She is a mother of two, author, presenter and coach. She lives in the idyllic coastal town of Merimbula, NSW, Australia.

*All written material on Relating To Men is subject to copyright to the author.

  • Alastair Haines

    Bravo, Jasmin! Thanks so much to you and your team for providing this vital accountability in the public interest. It’s amazing that ONE IN THREE intimate partner murder victims is a man in Australia this year, not too dissimilar to last year. But what’s more amazing is that we have a public narrative that leads us to expect something very different, when all the evidence to the contrary is there for those paid so much to look into the issues and address them. Thanks again for laying things out simply, clearly, and accurately, with reliable sources for the evidence linked to make verification easy. Very best to you for the new year.

  • disqus_ArQv6e31it

    Feminists treat DV as a numbers game and only the “highest scorer” gets recognition. This is really nothing but the feminist ideology of hate in action.