The Ugly Truth Of Female Violence

Written by Jasmin

In December 2014 Australia awoke to the devastating news that eight children had been violently murdered in a Cairns home. Mersane Warria was later taken into custody and charged with the murder of her seven children and her niece.  The nation grieved at the loss of these children as we began processing the unimaginable horrors they must have endured in their final moments.

In the following media reports there was speculation that domestic abuse was a common occurrence in Mersane Warria’s home and it’s reasonable to assume that her violent outbursts were not limited to a one off experience.  We have heard little of this tragedy since the news broke. A seemingly isolated event, this case has been pushed to the back of our minds as something that happened long ago in our past and something we would like to forget.

It is disturbing to think of women as abusive, violent and murderous, yet what is profoundly alarming is our dismissing them as being these things because we have an ingrained belief that women aren’t capable of such horrors. As with men, violent women have always been present and the information given here will show that violent and abusive women are not the anomaly we believe, but are prevalent in such numbers that we need to take notice.

Custom data obtained from the Australian Institute of Criminology (AIC) shows that prior to the Cairns deaths mothers contributed 60.6% of all child homicide deaths by biological parents in Australia during the period 2010-2012. With more recent multiple child deaths we can estimate that in the upcoming years we will see an alarming pattern that we have failed to address.

In the current narrative we are aiming to prevent violence against women, yet we are failing to acknowledge those women others need protection from.  This myopic opinion and lack of foresight is endorsed through the media and our government. We talk about domestic violence, family violence and intimate partner violence with the ongoing narrative being that men are the only significant perpetrators and that domestic violence and abuse is a ‘gendered’ issue. It is not.


When reporting, data should always be heavily scrutinised for validity. However, the media rarely fact-check when reporting about domestic violence, or at best are presenting one set of data only.  This disseminates information that is not only misleading but is adopted by their vast readerships and appallingly, by our government’s representatives.

After significant scrutiny, a retraction was recently published by The Guardian for a glaring error when they inaccurately reported the death rate of women. The media, the government and social conversations are responding to the same source material and we are bombarded with it. The source material tells us that the story of epidemic domestic violence is a ‘gendered’ issue with men disproportionately being perpetrators. Without doubt, everyone wants to solve this problem, but how can we do this if we don’t present and read all of the data?

What we have been ignoring is the prevalence of women who abuse and murder men, children and other women. This is the ugly truth of violence. This is what we need to talk about

This page serves to highlight female perpetrators who commit violent and abusive acts. This is not about which gender is worse or denying that men also are perpetrators, but it is instead a presentation of an alternate opinion on the stark realities of one of societies significant problems. If we are to address family violence we must do so thoughtfully and intelligently.


Domestic Abuse By Women 

The Australian Bureau of Statistics, Personal Safety Study (2012) [1] shows that women and men both experience abuse. In the experience of current partners, 2.9% of men and 4.5% of women experienced emotional abuse since the age of 15.

When we look at the experience of emotional abuse by a previous partner since the age of 15, 21.1% of women have experienced abuse along with men at 12.1%  [2] For men, this equates to a staggering 1,024,500 perpetrators the vast majority of whom are female, that we are currently not talking about. So while men abuse more, women are a significant contributor and there are many men who are dismissed, not taken seriously or simply do not disclose abuse in the home.

When talking about female victims, the accepted narrative is frequently that men may experience abuse but not fear.  However, almost half (46%) of all men who reported emotional abuse by a woman also reported experiencing fear and anxiety in relation to their abuse.

Gendered Abuse

A key factor to determine if abuse really is a gendered issue is to look at same sex relationships whereby 33% of all same sex couples have experienced intimate partner violence. This is broken down to female 41% and Male 28% [3 ] With the focus suggesting we must only protect women from men we are ignoring the fact that women need protecting from women.

The Australian Domestic & Family Violence Report [4] on same sex relationships also quotes US research that up to 46% of lesbians report domestic violence from an intimate partner. The figure for gay men was up to 20%.

Additionally the Fair’s Fair 2006 report on LGBT Community reported domestic abuse experiences from a previous partner being;

  • Women 32.4%
  • Men 30%

In each of these studies, females are shown to be at least equally, or more than twice as violent or abusive as males.

Domestic Homicide 

Custom data request sourced from the AIC provides detailed information from the genders for the period of 2010 to 2012.  The reported findings were as follows: [5]

  • 25.39% of all domestic homicide perpetrators are women. This is a rise of 2.4% from the previous period (2008/10).
  • 20 female parents murdered their children (<18), compared to 21 male parents (which includes 8 step fathers).
  • 46.5% of child domestic homicide perpetrators are female.

An often over looked statistic is that one male dies every 10 days from domestic homicide [6] compared to one woman every 7 days. 

1 Man Dies Every 10 Days on Average

1 Man Dies Every 10 Days on Average

The above data is frequently dismissed as being male perpetrated, however you will see below that during the period 2008 – 2010, women made up 50% of all perpetrators of adult male homicides. [7]  (Data extracted to show perpetrators of adult male victims)

50/50 Perpetrators

In 2010-2012 these figures show Females Perpetrators to be 23 and Males 28 proving yet again that Family homicide is not a gendered issue.

Childhood Abuse

The focus of childhood abuse is often that of sexual abuse. While this is certainly something we need to address, it makes up just 10-15% % of all childhood abuse experiences. In children, emotional abuse comprises 38% while neglect comprises 26%. [8]

The Australian Institute of Family Studies states “Evidence also suggests that mothers are more likely than fathers to be held responsible for child neglect. In a large representative study that examined the characteristics of perpetrators in substantiated cases of child abuse and neglect in the United States, neglect was the main type of abuse in 66% of cases involving a female caregiver, compared to 36% of cases involving a male caregiver (US DHHS, 2005).

In the following example of US data you will see that 70.6% of maltreatment of children is at the hands of their mother with just 29.4% by their father. [9]

Screen Shot 2015-04-25 at 8.36.36 am

Women And Stalking 

2.2% of all men experience stalking which equates to 184,100 men. Of the 4.2% of women who reported stalking in the last 12 months, 11% were from other women. [10]

Screen Shot 2015-04-21 at 8.05.11 pm

Other Domestic Violence

Before you read more stories about the issue of violence being only something unidirectional from men and boys, I ask you to take note of 1700 peer reviewed studies that clearly exposes the truth how domestic violence is NOT a gendered problem.

You will only ever learn what you study, and I strongly assert that we need to start asking better questions with a gender neutral approach to research and data analysis if we want to stem the domestic violence problem.


The following extensive list has been compiled to raise awareness of female perpetrators of violence, abuse and murder.  It was completed in approximately 90 minutes of researching with the Google search engine for recent news items (most in past 12 months). Given that we don’t usually see reporting of female perpetrated violence or abuse, and how when men present to police to report abuse from women they are dismissed or told to ‘man up’ and take it, the question is left begging as to how many other stories of abuse and physical violence don’t make it past the editor’s desk.

This lists was compiled using the different searches for:  Woman Killed Husband, Mother Kills Daughter, Daughter Kills Mother, Mother Kills Children, Woman Abuses Boyfriend, Sisters Kills Brother/Sister; Infanticide and so on. The evidence you receive will be found in what you search for.

I start with the stories of 110 Australian Stories Of Battered, Raped & Abused Men in Domestic Violence 

Female Perpetrators In The News

**This does not represent all cases, just ones bought to my attention or found through google**

Australia (Jan ’14 to Sept 2015)Victim Tally – 95

Woman Charged With Murder of Her  Sister

Adelaide Woman Murders Her Mother

Woman Charged With Murder in Katherine, NT

Woman Charged With Murder – Kalamburu WA

71 Year Old Woman Murdered By Her Daughter

Woman Murders Her Neighbour 

Woman Stabs Partner in Head & Leg

Campsie Woman Murders Baby and herself

Perth Woman Sentenced For Assault of 14 Year Old School Girl

Woman charged with grievous bodily harm of her same sex partner

Mother charged with murdering son with 70 different injuries (murder was 2010, charges laid in sept 2015)

Woman Charged With Attempted Murder of Partner

Woman Charged Over Stabbing – Adelaide

Woman Stabs Partner – Gold Coast

Female Officer Charged With Domestic Violence

Woman Charged After Stabbing Ex Husband – Sydney

False Rape Claims – Woman Found Guilty

Woman charged with soliciting to murder 

Mother charged with killing 3 children and attempting to kill 1 other

Mother Kills Two Children In Murder Suicide

Mother Kills Newborn Baby 

Central Australian Woman Assaults 19yo Woman

Perth woman assaults 74 year old woman and a male truck driver in break and enter

Meth Using Woman Jailed for 7 Months for Hitting A Child With Her Car

Woman accused of killing her husband 

Actress charged with sex offences of a 13 yo girl

Woman Charged Over Stabbing of Man

Mother Admits False Rape Claim – Charged

Woman Convicted for Rape of 12 Year Old Boy (she had a child to him – 2 victims)

Woman Cuts Throat of 6 Week Old Baby

5 Month Old Baby Girl Found Dead – Mother Charged

10 year old boy dies – mother charged

45 year old woman fatally stabs husband

Self Described Femme Fatal Kills Lover

22 yo Woman Charged With Murdering QLD Man

Toddler Kept In Esky – Found Dead

Woman Kills Ex Lovers New Fiance

Mother Drugged & Kills Sons In Murder Suicide

Woman stabs girlfriend in genitals 

Stabbed To Death By Ex Girlfriend

Foster Care Mother Charged With Sex Crimes of 4 year old

Mother Stabs Partner Because He Couldn’t Find Gifts

Brisbane Mother Abducts 2 Children 

Pregnant Australian Woman Convicted As Drug Mule 

Woman Charged With Knifing Man

Baby Found Buried – Mother Missing

Adelaide Woman Charged With Attempted Murder Of 1 Woman & Bashing Another 

Woman Murders Boy & Grandmother 

Perth Mother Faces Dangerous Driving Charge In Incident That Killed Her Daughter

Mother Suspected Of Killing Toddler 

Daughter Kills 71 Year Old Mother In Townsville

Mother of 3 year old boy charged with murder

Woman Charged With Brisbane Referee Murder

Woman Had Lover Slash Husbands Throat 

Perth Woman Attacks Man With Crowbar 

Perth Woman Arrested For Glassing Man

Mother Photographs Daughter Being Sexually Abused 

Mother Throws Baby Down Drain

Scarborough Woman Charged With Attempted Murder Of Female 

Woman Charged With Killing Man 73

Daughter Stands Trial For Murdering Mother In Canberra Home

Woman Has Australian Husband Murdered in Bali

Woman Who Murdered 8 Children

Mother Charged With Murder of Newborn Son

Woman Kills Husband And Cooks His Body

Elderly Woman Kills Husband With Axe

Horrific Abuse Of Child By Woman 

Grandmother Pour Boiling Water On Baby

Mother Pleads Guilty To Infanticide & Serious Harm To Other Child

Woman charged with attempted murder of 2 children in house fire she is also under investigation for interfering with a corpse of an infant previously

Grandmother Tries 3 Times To Kill Step Grandson

Murder Investigation of Grandmother Suspected of Killing 2 Children And Attempted Murder of 2 Others

Pre 2014

Kathleen Folbigg Convicted of Killing Her 4 Children

21 Children Severely Neglected 2 Mothers 3 Fathers

“Wonderful” Mother Murders 2 Year Old

Pregnant Australian Woman Convicted As Drug Mule 

Kristi Abrahams Trial for Murder of 6 Year Old Keisha

Mother Who Killed Child With Intentional Brain Injury To Look Accidental

Murder Suicide – Mother Kills Both Daughters 

Mother Intentionally Leaves Baby To Drown 

Woman Kills Boyfriend Christmas Day

Other Countries

Woman Arrested For Making Sex Tape With Her Son

911 call ignored from boy – mother kills him.

Mother Charged With Abuse Of 2 Year Old For Burning

Woman Beats Gardener To Death 

Woman Kills Two Children, Then Herself

Mother Kills Baby In Bathroom 

Woman Stabs Man Then Threatens To Cry Rape If He Reports

Woman Threatens To Bomb High School 

Woman Rapes 2 Year Old Son

Girl Jailed For False Rape 

Mother Repeatedly Rapes Her 2 Children

Woman Charged For False Rape Claim 

5 Women Suspended For Threatening Violence

Pregnant Woman Charged – Kills Boy And Says “Shit Happens” 

Woman Shoots & Kills Man After Sex Hookup – His Penis Was Too Big

Woman Beats Man With Bat On First Date

HIV Positive Girl Infects 324 Men – Intentionally 

Woman Threatens Man With Machete

Teacher Hires Hit man to Inflict ‘unbearable pain’ On Student She Was Having Sex With

Woman Stabs Roommate For Listening To Music 

Woman Sentenced for 20 Years For Munchausens Abuse Of Son

Mother Shoots At Police – Kills Her Own Son

Woman Arrested For Masturbating On Couples Car

Boy Severely Abused By Foster Mother

Outburst by Mother On Trial For Killing Her 2 Children

Woman Slashes Boyfriends Arm and Breaks Another Woman’s 

Woman Sentenced For Sex With Boy Scout

False Rape Accusation

Feminist Brags About Aborting Child – Because He’s a Boy

Female Teacher Sentenced for Sex With 5 Teens

Woman Who Falsely Accused of Rape, Then Charged With Murder of Boyfriend

Depraved Mother Sexually Abuses Twin Sons 

Mother Accused of Giving Baby Cocaine

Pennsylvania Woman Sentenced For Teen Rape

Woman Arrested For Thuggery 

Woman Torches Mans Car For Refusing A Cigarette

Virginia Woman Guilty of Sex With Teen

Kansas Teacher Arrested For Sex Crimes 

Connecticut Teacher Accused of Sexual Assault 

Woman Arrested For Prostituting A Girl

Mother Throws Naked Party For Teen Daughter – Arrested

Female Teacher Has Sex With Student On Bus

Woman Pleads Guilty To Sex With Teen Boy

Woman Abandons Quadriplegic Son In Park To See Her Boyfriend

Actress Emma Roberts Arrested For Beating Up Boyfriend

Woman Arrested For Beating Up Husband

34 Year Old Woman Drowns Her 2 Infant Sons

College Girls Banned for Objectifying Builders 

Female Sex Predators List

51 Women Accused Of Sexual Misconduct Or Assault Of Minors 

12 Year Old Daughter Kills Parents With Boyfriend 

Mother Who Ripped Out Her Son’s Heart

Nanny Caught Stomping Child

Woman Convicted of Violent Abuse

Daughter Kills Both Parents and Buries Them In Yard

Welsh Woman Jailed for Sex with Minor 

Sikh Grandmother Plotted Killing Over Tea

Malaysian Mother Beats Child

Pregnant Woman Smoking  & Drinking Because She Is Carrying a Boy She Wished She Had Aborted

Woman Slashes Husband With A Knife For Using Toilet

Law Student Laughs After Cutting Mans Head Open


Historical Cases

American Female Serial Killers

10 Most Evil Women In Concentration Camps








[7] (table 7)




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About the author


Jasmin is a specialist men’s coach who supports men in all aspects of relationships, but specifically those who are going through high conflict separation and divorce. She is also a dedicate advocate for services for men and their children who have been victims of domestic violence and abuse.

Jasmin helps men who are struggling and feeling lost and alone, to move to a place of acceptance and confidence so they can move ahead and live a life consistent with their values and beliefs. She believes strongly in the power of overcoming past hurts through empathy and compassion.

She is a mother of two, author, presenter and coach. She lives in the idyllic coastal town of Merimbula, NSW, Australia.

*All written material on Relating To Men is subject to copyright to the author.