Saying Good-Bye To Rosie

Written by Jasmin

While the year of domestic violence hysteria is almost behind us, the follow on effects and damage caused by this ideological agenda are going to be long lasting. Jasmin Newman and Mark Dent ask the questions that we all want to hear answers to. 

This week, Mark Latham gave his very pertinent parting shots to Rosie Batty in his now famed TripleM podcast. Like him or loathe him, many thousands of men and more than a few women around the country applauded his tenacity. Thank god there are still some straight shooters left in media broadcasting.  A heartfelt thank you to TripleM for giving him the space.

Latham made some very relevant points. In typical hypocritical fashion the feminist groups like White Ribbon who insist that men are the solution to ending men’s violence, have attempted to shut down a man giving them very valuable insights into the things that impact Australian men. Shock-horror, mens experience of the world is different to womens.

As we knew, it took but a nano second for the feminists to try and have him silenced, taken off air, and otherwise removed from having a voice. In the absence of anything constructive, headlines around the country were fuelled by feminist opinion. The Herald Sun called him a ‘DV apologist’, A multitude of others (lacking in originality) called his podcast ‘an incredible spray’ and of course all the predictable and seemingly endless cries of ‘Misogyny’ (yawn) were all over social media.

Ladies: having an opinion different to yours does not mean someone hates an entire gender. Deal with it or get a dictionary. I don’t care which.

While the feminists went into overdrive and calling for his sacking from TripleM in a fairly benign and very inconsequential number of supporters on a change.org petition, Triple M decided to they want to try and give Rosie her final hoorah to rebut Latham’s very relevant claims. We aren’t sure if it’s going ahead, but if it did we have our questions prepared.

Like myself, Mark Dent is a fellow author who has been deeply offended by much of Rosie’s dogma this past year.  He, like many Australian men has some burning questions he would like to ask Rosie. Both of us would give up everything just to be the ones putting her in the ‘hot seat’.

Here is what Mark had in mind.

1. Rosie, given the fact that you claim domestic violence is a gendered issue and a result of male entitlement and privilege, how do you explain the fact that so far this year, four men have been murdered by their female partners. At this point in 2016, no women have killed in a DV incident.

2. Given that you claim domestic violence is a gendered issue, meaning a result of male violence and power…how do you explain the figures released by the Australian Bureau of Statistics in 2015 which stated that in the past decade 52% of all children killed in domestic incidents were in fact murdered by women. That is a majority of children murdered by women. Additionally, how do you explain that of the recorded victims of domestic violence in 2014 that 38,000 were women and almost 16,000 were men.

3. You claim that mental illness and drug abuse is no excuse for domestic violence, yet every time a child or children are killed by women we present a shopping list of excuses for their violence. Women are often absolved of murder based upon mental illness, post natal depression or we are told they were under great strain or it was a cry for help. Can you explain these double standards?

4. When Darcy Freeman was thrown from the West Gate bridge by her dad it dominated our newspapers for months and is in fact still written about and referenced as a good example of male entitlement and violence. Last year eight children were hacked to death by a mother. This is the worst case of child murder in our nation’s history-yet this story has disappeared without a trace from our any media coverage. You have never once referred to it in any speech or article yet you have mentioned incidents where dads killed a child on many occasions. When David Farquahrson drowned his three sons by deliberately driving into a lake he was branded a monster, and like Freeman, his face and name were constantly in our media for years after the incident. In fact a book (by Helen Garner) has been released on the murders just last year. Yet when a mother drove her children into a lake here in Melbourne (2015), drowning three of them in a deliberate act of murder, she too disappeared from all media coverage only a day or so after the incident. Can you explain the reason why our media reports the DV murders committed by men in such a different manner to the murders committed by women? Why did you make no reference to the knifing of eight children by a mother when you gave your address to the National Press Club only a few weeks after the incident took place yet you dug up an example of a father who killed a family member from an incident which predated the massacre by years?

5. When you and Fiona Richardson hosted a vigil for victims of family violence at Federation Square last year, you did not read the name of one man. Nineteen men were killed by women in DV incidents last year and a similar number the year before. How do you justify the way in which you and our government ignore male victims. The argument that women are the main victims is irrelevant.

6. Men should at least be allocated a third of the funding women receive, given that every reputable survey of family violence indicates that one third of all victims are male. Every year at our ANZAC Day ceremonies, the master of ceremonies asks everyone to stand and honour the sacrifice of our brave men and women. Men and women are given equal respect and acknowledgement, despite the fact that 70 000 men were killed and perhaps 6 women behind the lines. If a man were to suggest the placing of women on an equal footing with men with regard to sacrifice in time of war is inappropriate he would be torn apart by the media, feminist lobby groups and his very job would be threatened. Yet the gap in victims of DV is far closer than wartime sacrifice, and men are entirely invisible and ignored. Do you find this incredibly hypocritical?

7. How does focusing on the needs of male victims in any way undermine the help we give to women? All of these questions give credence to Mark Latham’s claim that you have an ideological agenda.

There is little more I can add to these well articulated questions except to point out that these do not come from a place of ‘misogyny’, they come from a place of pain and suffering. This is the pain of men and their children who are ignored due to the gender theorists who have dominated the media and the money for much needed services.

I would like to ask Rosie a series of rapid questions about the men and their children she has forced into silence.

  • What would you say to comfort the thousands of male victims who are sleeping rough in their cars or on the streets?
  • How would you console the children who are forced to remain home with their abusive mother because no shelter will take them with their Dad?
  • Can you explain to these children why their Dads are put at the bottom of the list for housing and so therefore it’s unlikely they will ever visit with him or live safely with him?
  • GP’s are being educated to believe that all male victims must be the perpetrator. When a child discloses maternal abuse, what do you propose the GP does… a) dismiss them? b) victim blame?
  • Women killed 9 women and 11 children and 19 men last year. Have you ever considered that these women didn’t ‘love’ those they killed?
  • The biggest number of domestic violence deaths was 1-8 December where in a single week 3 women where charged with murder and 2 counts of  attempted murder of their partners and children. Why didn’t you make a statement about this Rosie?

Venomous rebuttals from women’s lobbyists constantly come with cries of ‘get your own services’ when they know full well that they are skewing statistics and using terms like ‘overwhelming’ when many issues of domestic violence are marginal, at best. This is with the sole intent to prevent men from getting services and to keep womens jobs in women’s lobby groups alive.  Glass ceiling, my arse. It’s more like a bottomless glass pit of funds.

Violence against women is an important issue, but it is not the only issue. We are all worthy of protection; even men and their children.

Unlike Rosie, this work is entirely unfunded – any donations graciously received.

Further reading:

An Open Letter To Rosie Batty

Smoke Mirrors & Violence Against Women

Secrets & Lies of White Ribbon

The Feminist Elephant In The Room

Photo credit: TripleM

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About the author

Jasmin

Jasmin is a specialist men’s coach who supports men in all aspects of relationships, but specifically those who are going through high conflict separation and divorce. She is also a dedicate advocate for services for men and their children who have been victims of domestic violence and abuse.

Jasmin helps men who are struggling and feeling lost and alone, to move to a place of acceptance and confidence so they can move ahead and live a life consistent with their values and beliefs. She believes strongly in the power of overcoming past hurts through empathy and compassion.

She is a mother of two, author, presenter and coach. She lives in the idyllic coastal town of Merimbula, NSW, Australia.

*All written material on Relating To Men is subject to copyright to the author.